Her Turn

Now that my older son is off to Kindergarten, my daughter and I have found ourselves in a new and different world. I realized that the start of school didn’t just impact my son, my daughter and I would need to adjust to our first ‘Mama time’ since she was born. Always in the past, we’ve been the trio, and now we’re down to two. I had no idea that the days would be so different. The hours passed just as they had every day previous, but they just weren’t the same. They were missing something. They were missing the laughter and giggles of our third playmate. So how do we adjust? How do we transition into this next phase of ‘just the two of us’?

It actually seems a bit daunting - the job of replacing her best friend during the day. Will I keep her entertained like he did? Will I measure up to her expectations? As we are just in our first week with our new routine, we are only beginning to adjust to our time alone. I know we will find our own way, and I am excited for the journey.

Still, she misses her big brother. She has begun to be afraid. I am attributing this to the fact that now she feels alone. Granted, I have always been home with both of my children, but now that her brother is away at school, she is now the only little one in the house. Because of these fears, I have sworn off seemingly benign children’s books that talk about bears (even friendly ones), as she believes we have a ‘Bad Mama Bear’ sleeping somewhere in this house. (I am trying really hard not to make a connection to that one.) Many times she will ask me to be quiet, or even whisper so we don’t wake the bear. In addition, she now has an intense fear of the hallway. Even when all the lights are on, she is afraid to go to her room or even the bathroom. (Perhaps that explains the numerous accidents she has been having lately…) I constantly attempt to quell her fears, and offer to go with her, but there are always tears, and much encouragement is needed.

All the experts will tell you that during times of stress and change, a child may regress. I can understand. I think that holds true for adults as well. Quite honestly, as I have been living this week full of drastic changes, I haven’t felt like doing laundry or cleaning the house. The difference between adults and children, though, is that adults know we must snap out of it -- quickly! Each of us handles everything so differently, and in our own time. I know that as time goes on, and we settle in, my daughter and I are going to have the best adventure ever!