A Grape Jam Day
Today I made grape jam - a lot of grape jam. I reveled in the time spent with my daughter at our kitchen table. Me plucking grapes from the stems, and my daughter, sitting across from me, learning letters in her workbook. It reminded me of when I was a child, spending Saturday mornings with my mother in the kitchen making bread for the week. I can still be there. Standing, waiting for my cue to add more flour, marveling at the yeast, and watching my mother’s very capable hands as she kneaded the dough - for what seemed like hours - until it was perfect. Saturday night couldn’t come quickly enough. I knew I would be able to sample one of the buns - fresh from the oven - BEFORE dinner. There is nothing like piping hot homemade bread slathered in butter and honey. I truly believe that my mother would have considered that a balanced meal (much like chocolate cake), but there would also be something just as wonderful waiting for us to have for dinner. That is my mother - that’s just what she does.
Lately I have been struggling with my changing role. After stepping down from Directorship in my company, I have found myself feeling ‘less than’. I know I am a good wife and mother, but why is it that so often we are defined as what our job title is? I suppose I could tell everyone that I am a wife, mother, laundress, cook, kisser of boo-boos, teacher, housekeeper, and chauffeur, but I can imagine their eyes glazing over and mouths hanging open. Besides, who am I to toot my own horn? I am a mom who has the privilege of being home with my children. But am I doing a good enough job? I do realize that my mother is probably not perfect, and there could be some things about my childhood that don’t stand out in my memory as clearly as her homemade bread, but sometimes I can’t help but wonder what my children will recall when they are grown.
A couple of days ago I had the opportunity to spend the day with my mother - something that does not happen very often. We had a great day. Just having uninterrupted time in the car to talk might not seem all that novel, but when you consider that most times we are together there are at least 2 children (and most of the time 4) running around, it truly was wonderful. We actually had the opportunity to talk without interruption. We talked about kids and life and anything and everything. We spent time with my grandparents and aunt as my grandmother was the featured speaker (and author) at a quilt show (but that’s a topic for another day). It was a perfect day. Why? Nothing particularly amazing happened (besides my grandmother’s speech); I think I just needed some time alone with my mother. Is that enough? Really, is that all we need - time with each other?
When my husband got home from work today, he asked our daughter if she had a good day. Her response - “Yeah, I got a Mama day today!” Maybe our days don’t have to be filled with outrageous and crazy happenings. My daughter was excited that we got to spend the day together just talking and sitting in the kitchen, much like I was excited that I got to spend a day with my mother just talking and being in her company. My little girl may not remember the day we went into grape jam production, but I know she had a great day. Maybe I’m doing just fine.
Lately I have been struggling with my changing role. After stepping down from Directorship in my company, I have found myself feeling ‘less than’. I know I am a good wife and mother, but why is it that so often we are defined as what our job title is? I suppose I could tell everyone that I am a wife, mother, laundress, cook, kisser of boo-boos, teacher, housekeeper, and chauffeur, but I can imagine their eyes glazing over and mouths hanging open. Besides, who am I to toot my own horn? I am a mom who has the privilege of being home with my children. But am I doing a good enough job? I do realize that my mother is probably not perfect, and there could be some things about my childhood that don’t stand out in my memory as clearly as her homemade bread, but sometimes I can’t help but wonder what my children will recall when they are grown.
A couple of days ago I had the opportunity to spend the day with my mother - something that does not happen very often. We had a great day. Just having uninterrupted time in the car to talk might not seem all that novel, but when you consider that most times we are together there are at least 2 children (and most of the time 4) running around, it truly was wonderful. We actually had the opportunity to talk without interruption. We talked about kids and life and anything and everything. We spent time with my grandparents and aunt as my grandmother was the featured speaker (and author) at a quilt show (but that’s a topic for another day). It was a perfect day. Why? Nothing particularly amazing happened (besides my grandmother’s speech); I think I just needed some time alone with my mother. Is that enough? Really, is that all we need - time with each other?
When my husband got home from work today, he asked our daughter if she had a good day. Her response - “Yeah, I got a Mama day today!” Maybe our days don’t have to be filled with outrageous and crazy happenings. My daughter was excited that we got to spend the day together just talking and sitting in the kitchen, much like I was excited that I got to spend a day with my mother just talking and being in her company. My little girl may not remember the day we went into grape jam production, but I know she had a great day. Maybe I’m doing just fine.
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